Livingston

Aug
16
2007

Fake Caveman Brings Club, Tells All

73423477 The Cavemen show comes out on October 1. The award-winning commercials are hilarious. ABC is using social media to promote the show. And sure enough, a fake Caveman twitter blog has suddenly appeared. We approached our fake neanderthal friend and scored a very revealing interview, including discussion on fake-blogging and the Caveman’s identity.

BB: OK, why Twitter? Is it so easy a caveman can use it?

FCM: I’m not 100 percent liking your tone, Geoff. That’s not a very nice thing to say after the very public ordeal we’ve had with GEICO. Your own comment policy says you don’t condone personal attacks.

BB: Uh, well that was designed for a particular person. But, good point. I was wrong. Can you answer why you chose Twitter as compared to Pownce or Jaiku or a conventional blog?

FCM: I wanted to microblog. It seemed better for one liners, and after all Cavemen is supposed to be a sitcom. Plus I didn’t want to invest too much time writing, but wanted to interact with the community. Twitter has the most users, so there you have it.

BB: You promised to tell who you are…

FCM: I’m GigaOm. Om Malik.

BB: No, you’re not. Your writing styles don’t match.

FCM: Darn. OK, I’m Seth Godin.

BB: Right, we’re coming back to this later. Your fake microblog is only a week old. Why now? Why the Caveman?

FCM: Well if Dan Lyons can do it without repercussion from Forbes, why can’t I? And that’s really the point. Forbes celebrated the Fake Steve Jobs — written by one if its senior journalists — when in actuality that journalist committed an ethical blunder. Lyons has slammed blogging in the past, and reports on technology.

Yet, because it’s a parody and openly fake, it’s OK. Nevermind, the ethics or the obvious issues behind Forbes’ possibly compromised masthead.

In a far more serious example, Whole Foods CEO John Mackey used a false identity to comment on his competitors. Controversy ensues, yet is he held accountable by the Whole Foods board, the SEC or his investors? No. Instead he just stops blogging. So what does that tell you?

Both of these recent events tell me that America thinks it’s OK to use a fake identity to attack or ridicule people. And that we don’t value privacy or respect personal values like standing behind our name and other aspects of integrity. It’s Ethics 2.0. Enter the Fake Caveman.

Now, onto your second question. The Caveman was an easy choice. It’s a funny character, and it’s hot with the show coming out. Unlike Lyons and Mackey, I don’t think anyone in their right mind will take the Fake Caveman seriously. In that sense, it’s a true lampoon.

BB: It’s not OK to use a fake identity like that.

FCM: Please don’t criticize me for ethics. You’re a PR guy. PR and ethics, isn’t that an oxymoron? “Trust me, I’m in PR?” Please, that’s so obvious, that yes, even a caveman gets it. Time to get off the high horse, Geoff.

BB: Moving on, moving on. We received some questions from our readers for you. Thanks Toby Bloomberg, Nikki Brochner (via Pownce) and Scott Monty (via Twitter) for your input.

BBR: Who do you think is more interesting: The real you or your fake self?

FCM: Definitely, the fake me. The real me is a nerd blogger. The fake me is a pimpin’ Hollywood star.

BBR: What will you do for work now that you’ll probably lose your job?

FCM: I’m not worried about losing my job. I’m the CEO. Again, it’s the new ethics thanks to Forbes and Whole Foods. Fake commenting and blogging is cool, right?

BBR: What sign are you?

FCM: Gemini.

BBR: What was the “twitter” of the Neanderthal days?

FCM: There wasn’t any until we invented fire. Then there were smoke signals.

BBR: What’s it like to be the newest sex symbol?

FCM: Great!!!! Women used to run away from me, now they flock to me. It’s good to be the Caveman.

BBR: What will you wear at the next red carpet event?

FCM: A Hugo Boss suit, no tie (because I’m a neanderthal)!

BBR: How do 21st women compare to the chicks in the caves?

FCM: Great question. The few 21st century women who approach me want a brute. You know, a caveman!!!! Rough guy! But I’m really quite a sensitive man so many women who are attracted to Cavemen find themselves turned off by my “metroness.” It can be quite disappointing.

Chicks in the cave hated being dragged around by my friends, so they liked me more. Sensitivity worked back then.

Maybe a Harley would help…

BB: OK, that’s it from our readers. Now you promised. Who are you?

FCM: Why, I’m you, of course.

In memory of Hunter S. Thompson.

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